Today's the day

I'm going to the Doctor today for my pregnancy test.

I'll keep you posted.

Is it just me?

6:30 AM – I can hear Jacob’s alarm clock going off in his room. It was too loud. I went in to turn it down. He was climbing down his ladder to do the same.

I put the dogs out. I asked him to get dressed before playing. He did so without any argument or attitude.

I fed the dogs and put them out again before getting in the shower. It was raining very lightly. I knew the dogs would be wet. I wanted them in relatively quickly. In my robe I scurried to the back door. I warned Jacob that I was letting the dogs in. I asked if he wanted his door closed since he was playing on the floor and may not want wet dogs coming in excitedly. He was glad I shut his door.

I came to his room again, after getting dressed. I knocked and after getting his OK to come in, I suggested breakfast. Since he had done such a good job of getting up and getting dressed we had lots of time. I asked him what he’d like for breakfast. He said he wanted to go to Krispie Kreme. I said no, that I meat I would make either waffles or scrambled eggs.

Right then attitude began because I told him no. His tone switched to hateful and his volume doubled.

I walked out of the room. He continued to growl, grunt, mumble, vent, shout and in general be hateful to me. I calmly told him that talking to me that way was not ok. I gave him the chance to change his attitude. I ended up giving him 2 sets of swats: 1 the first time and then 10 minutes later 2 more. In about 5 minutes he changed his tune. He came to the kitchen and asked very nicely, “May I have waffles please mom?”

We have an incident every day like that. Not always to the point of swats, but a struggle every day. Here’s my horoscope for the day – pretty funny.

Gemini
While you may feel the urge to put on a pair of boxing gloves and duke it out with your family, dear Gemini, try putting on an apron instead. Cooking a meal or performing other domestic chores will help take your mind off your troubles with your family. If you are not the domestic sort, exchange the apron for a blazer and bury yourself in your work. These tensions on the home front will pass quickly enough.

Spelling Test

Jacob had his first spelling test on Friday. He brought home his practice test Thursday. He spelled all the words correctly. However, the handwriting portion of the grade was only 85 out of 100. The homework for the night was to write the misspelled words 5 times each. He got to write out the whole test, just for practice. He was quited stressed out about his big final.

He did great. 100 on spelling and 92 on handwriting. He was very excited.

I also had my first performance review after 3 years of working at the same place. I had been written up almost two years ago. Yet now, I am "excellent". Go figure. At least my file has more than one piece of paper now. And I did get a raise. Not a bunch, but it was something.

We celebrated by going out to dinner.

Embarassed

We spent an hour in Randy the counselor’s office yesterday

Jacob was completely out of hand. He spit at Randy.
I was mortified.
I think Randy wanted me to spank him.
I wanted to spank him.

The problem is that Jacob is too big and too strong for me to turn him over when he goes stiff and lays on his back. He knows this, so rather than have a physical battle in his office. We finished the session. In the car once he settled down, I told him he was getting two swats from me when we got home. Fortunately, Michael was home. Not that he had any part of this, but Jacob is in line when Daddy’s home. I told Jacob to take his pants down and bend over. I spanked his bottom and sent him to his room 5:20. He knew why he got the spanking and that there was no need for a fit. He went peacefully to his room.

At 5:30 I asked him to come out and talk to Mommy and Daddy and to bring Bearda. We told him that he was losing Bearda for 3 days and no biking, TV, Books, Movies, or Computer until Monday. That during this time he could play in his room or out side. No friends over, no whining about being bored.

He said he was going outside to play.

I told him he could go outside and play after cleaning his room. He’s known for 2 days that Merry Maids was coming Thursday morning. On Tuesday night he picked up ½ of the toys on his floor. Wednesday he would have to pick up the other half.

At 6:30 I went back into his room and told him I was ordering dinner. He could come out and have his dinner when he was finished with his room.

Dinner came at 7:00. No improvement on the room. He now had 1 hour to clean his room, eat dinner, take a shower and get in bed by 8:00. It dawned on him that he might miss dinner. He got it into gear at about 7:25. He was in bed by 8:00 and all the other things were done. No fights, no crying, no fits, no yelling. I told him how proud I was of him for doing this without fighting. It made for a nice night.

This morning he got up, got dressed, brushed his teeth, fed the dogs, got his back pack ready, at his breakfast and got in the car without prompting – not even once. I made a pretty big deal out of how nice it was.

No Monday dull drums here!!

I am so easily thrilled.
We've known each other for years .
We're 100s of miles apart.
We're moms and wives.
We don't talk every day.
When we do talk, it makes my day.
I had a day like that yesterday.

Yesterday was also a big day for our family.
The first attempt of IUI (a.k.a. turkey baster) was yesterday.
Leading up to the IUI
I took my clomid for 5 days
I took FSH shots for another 8 days
I took the HCG shot one day
36 hours later...... IUI
We got to the office at 8:15.
Michael collected his specimin.
They "washed" it - whatever that means.
We waited.
They did an ultrasound on me.
We waited.
They did the procedure.
They put me upside down for 15 minutes.
We left the office at 11:00.
I felt weird all day. Like an Ob/Gyn appointment that was too intense.
I went to the gym last night and took it easy.
The nurse said no Step Aerobics..... darn :)
The weight training (with low amounts of weights) and Yoga were fine.

I should know something by the end of the month!

Counseling

We spent an hour in the counselor’s office yesterday. As soon as we touched on a point that Jacob didn’t want to talk about he yelled his answers.

The counselor feels it is nothing more complicated than a couple of issues.

Jacob thinks he lives in a Burger King, where he can have it his way whenever he wants.
Jacob wants to be with me. He’ll do what ever it takes to get my attention.

The counselor gave us three things to enforce.

1 Rules – Jacob knows how to behave. He behaves at school.
2 Routine – we’ve got a pretty good routine and we need to stick to it.
3 Responsibilities – Jacob needs to do his part around the house.


The counselor gave us one thing to work on.

1 Jacob needs to bring the volume level down when expressing his anger.

We’re going back weekly for a while. I hope this expands to family counseling – not just Jacob counseling. He learned this somewhere…..

Chicago was great

The trip to Chicago was WONDERFUL....... We had a great time. Wednesday all we managed to do after arriving was find the Pizza place - Gino's East. Fantastic pizza. It fed us for 3 days.

Thursday was the museum of Science and Industry. It was the best. We spent 6+ hours there exploring every corner. We had dinner with Michael's cousins. They were great too.

Friday we went to the Lincoln Park Zoo - and again saw every corner of the place. We rented the swan boats on the little pond. I swear it was 100 degrees with 100 % humidity. We spent 4 hours there before I thought I would melt. We went back to the hotel, showered and went to dinner with Mitchell and Deb.

Saturday we went to the Shedd Aquarium. Very impressive Oceanarium with the sharks. The dolphin show and the reef were cool too. We had dinner with the family again. Everyone was there. Jacob and Betty, Mitchell and Deb and all the cousins and their kids. Jacob and Betty are Mitchell's aunt and uncle. So they are Jacob's great, great aunt and uncle. It was very fun.

The trip home - not so great. Dropping off the car wasn't so bad. The lines at Midway however were terrible. They have 1 ticket agent for American -since they are almost out of that airport. They had 2 TSA stations for all the luggage. Then the security line for the people. What a mess...... and slow. Good thing we gave ourselves nearly 2 hours! We got to the gate as they were boarding..... Jacob almost had an accident in his pants 'cause we were stuck in line. Poor kid. Fortunately we made it.

We're home, we're tired, we don't have luggage - yet. Nothing imperative is in the bags.

On the way to the car, in the parking lot of the airpoit, I fell and twisted my ankle (right) and bashed my knee (left). Jacob helped me get the carry on bag into the car and iced me down when we got home.

My head hurts and I could use a nap. Jacob is entertaining himself in his room.

We're going to dinner at either Jason's Deli or Zookini's (both have a great salad bar and something for Jacob).

School is starting!

Monday morning, Jacob starts the 1st grade.

He's excited about being in Mrs. Bullard's class. I know his reading is at least second grade level, so he's going to start out where most first graders end their year.

The temper tantrums have continued and have increased in intensity. We've sought help. The counseling center is seeing us weekly, trying to figure out what's wrong, when it started, what we can do to help, how to deal with the anger that is coming out and so on. We've only had one visit so it is hard to tell. I am hopeful though.

Work is way too busy. I am not sure what to do about it.

We are on cyle two trying for another kiddo. I've taken my medicine and my booster shot. On Monday I'll have an ultra sound. Then we'll monitor for the right day.... and then the turkey baster method. I know it takes the romance out of it, but so do injections. The sooner the better.

Traveling is over for us. We all went to Hawaii, Jacob went to Oklahoma and Arkansas, we all went to Chicago, and I went to Atlanta for business. I'm ready to just be home.

Jacob pushed every button this morning

he fought me on getting dressed.
he fought me on eating breakfast.
he fought me on packing his bag/lunch.
he fought me on putting on his shoes.
he fought me on the way to sports camp.
he fought me and followed me out of the building and wouldn't let me leave.
he cried.
he cried.
he yelled.
he cried.
he hugged.
he clung.
he cried some more.
I cried.
I'm still not ok
I will be, but it will take me a little time.
I need to keep busy.
I need to work.
I need to focus on something else.